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Check out the resume of the "Ultimate Employee"

I’m not sure how I got this, but today in my Inbox I received a resume and bio from someone looking for a job. It is obviously spam, since there is absolutely no customization whatsoever. But what was funny about it is the fact that this person is pretty much the Ultimate Employee.

It starts off great with the Summary (I have not changed the text at all):

Over ten years of experience in Design, Analysis, Management, Development, Implementation, Testing and Debugging Web, Network, Financial applications using C#, C/C++, VC++/MFC/SDK, VB, UML, ASP/JSP, VBScript, JavaScript, Crystal Reports, HTML/XML, RDBMS (SQL Server, ORACLE, Informix and Sybase) and COM/ATL. Has Extensive knowledge and proficient in Microsoft Technology using Oracle and SQL Server. Has work experience in Banking, Health care, Manufacturing, Security, Content Management system and Automation. Experienced in Object Oriented, scalable, robust, maintainable, Multithreading and image processing Techniques. Has 2 years experience in .NET Framework using C#, ADO.NET and ASP.NET. Familiar with RUP, Design patterns and Extreme programming

Wow, the buzzword count on that is off the charts! Now, check out the technical skills (again, no change):

  • O.S.:  Solaris, AIX, RTOS and Windows 2000/XP
  • Languages: C++ and Java.
  • Web Services: SOAP, UDDI and WSDL
  • Scripting: XML, XSL, ASP/JSP, JScript, VBScript, Perl, TCL and Vignette.
  • Middle Ware: COM/DCOM and CORBA.
  • Server:  BizTalk, MQ Series, WebSphere, Weblogic, Apache and IIS.
  • Databases: Oracle, MS-SQL Server and MS Access.
  • IDE: Visual Studio and Visual Age
  • GUI: Visual C#/C++/Basic, ATL, MFC, JDK and SDK
  • Specialization: .NET Framework, ADO.NET, ASP.NET, ODBC and ISAPI.
  • CASE Tools: Rational Rose and Visio.
  • Reporting: Crystal Reports and Office Web components.
  • Testing: Visual Test, NUnit, Silk and LoadRunner.
  • Source control: Visual Source Safe, Clear Case and RCS/CVS.
  • Project Management: Microsoft Project.

I know what you’re thinking. This person could not possibly know all these skills!

Wrong, wrong I say! The reason he knows all of these is that every project he has been on has used 10 or more of these technologies, regularly mixing Java, C++ and MFC, C# and VB.NET, SQL Server, Oracle, Sybase, Windows Server, Solaris, Extreme Programming and RUP on the same project!

This guy has done almost everything! Who wouldn’t want to hire this guy?! Send me an email today and I'll give you his info!


Posted Mon, May 10 2004 12:11 PM by Darrell Norton

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Comments

Todd wrote re: Check out the resume of the "Ultimate Employee"
on Mon, May 10 2004 8:39 AM
Come on now, I wouldn't say what is on his resume is unattainable. I have just over 2 years experience out of school, and my resume (while generally more sparse than his) is not all that different. I would think that with 6-8 years of consulting could result in a resume as impressive as his.
Chris Wallace wrote re: Check out the resume of the "Ultimate Employee"
on Mon, May 10 2004 8:52 AM
That just makes me think of more things to add to mine. I scaled down my "technical skills" to stritcly software related and only included those that would likely be part of a position I'd be interested in. My summary is also more generic and is far shorter.
Mark wrote re: Check out the resume of the "Ultimate Employee"
on Mon, May 10 2004 8:58 AM
Todd you might be right. You might just have all those buzz words on your resume in 6-8 years. But will you be actively using what you learned 6-8 years prior? If you have one year experience with Oracle 6 years ago and have not touched it since, is it still a valid skill? Should you still put it on your resume?

I’ve dropped many tools because I haven’t used them in years, specifically Visual Studio 6.0. Yea I’ve got years of experience and a certification with it, but do I want to do that work again? Do I really want to do legacy development? It’s been three years since I’ve touched it.

Sometimes less is really more.

--Mark
Darrell wrote re: Check out the resume of the "Ultimate Employee"
on Mon, May 10 2004 9:48 AM
Todd - obviously you have never been on the "other side" of the fence, in the position of hiring. If someone had that much on their resume, my first thought is to not believe it.

My second thought, should the first one be proven false, is that this person does not focus on anything. A mile wide and an inch deep. Employees that have this kind of resume expect the "mile-wide" pay while all I get on any one project is "inch-deep" experience.
Darrell wrote re: Check out the resume of the "Ultimate Employee"
on Mon, May 10 2004 9:49 AM
Chris - I would say that you are doing the right thing. As I focus on Microsoft technologies, I have long ago pitched non-Microsoft related things (like Cold Fusion, Perl, Unix, etc.) on my resume!
andrew75@gmx.de (Andrew Whitten) wrote RE: Check out the resume of the "Ultimate Employee"
on Mon, May 10 2004 10:11 AM
Don't forget that a lot of hiring goes through HR offices, and they discard CVs if they don't meet all the 'requirements'.
This guy will get to 'stage 2'. I hope he will be able to justify it to the techies :)
Darrell wrote re: Check out the resume of the "Ultimate Employee"
on Mon, May 10 2004 10:20 AM
Andrew - very true!
Lisa Becker - Microsoft Recruiting wrote re: Check out the resume of the "Ultimate Employee"
on Thu, Dec 9 2004 3:24 AM
Hi Darrell,
I would really like to get in touch with the person you reference.
thanks in advance,
LB
Darrell wrote re: Check out the resume of the "Ultimate Employee"
on Thu, Dec 9 2004 3:38 AM
Um, are you serious?
Rasik Jain wrote re: Check out the resume of the "Ultimate Employee"
on Mon, Jan 31 2005 7:58 AM
I think, any consultant who is working for 5 to 6 yrs can attain these skills. Nothing wrong in keeping these skills on resume. Many companies will discard resume, if the candidate is lacking only on one skill.
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